Elder Russell M. Nelson
Of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles
"Our family is the focus of our greatest work and joy in this life;
so will it be throughout all eternity."
Years ago when Sister Nelson and I had several teenaged daughters, we took our
family on a vacation far away from telephones and boyfriends. We went on a raft
trip down the Colorado River through the Grand Canyon. As we started our journey,
we had no idea how dangerous this trip could be.
The first day was beautiful. But on the second day, when we approached Horn
Creek rapids and saw that precipitous drop ahead, I was terrified. Floating
on a rubber raft, our precious family was about to plunge over a waterfall!
Instinctively I put one arm around my wife and the other around our youngest
daughter. To protect them, I tried to hold them close to me. But as we reached
the precipice, the bended raft became a giant sling and shot me into the air.
I landed into the roiling rapids of the river. I had a hard time coming up.
Each time I tried to find air, I hit the underside of the raft. My family couldn't
see me, but I could hear them shouting, "Daddy! Where's Daddy?"
I finally found the side of the raft and rose to the surface. The family pulled
my nearly drowned body out of the water. We were thankful to be safely reunited.
The next several days were pleasant and delightful. Then came the last day,
when we were to go over Lava Falls, known as the most dangerous drop of the
journey. When I saw what was ahead, I immediately asked to beach the raft and
hold an emergency family council meeting, knowing that if we were to survive
this experience, we needed to plan carefully. I reasoned with our family: "No
matter what happens, the rubber raft will remain on top of the water. If we
cling with all our might to ropes secured to the raft, we can make it. Even
if the raft should capsize, we will be all right if we hang tightly to the ropes."
I turned to our little seven-year-old daughter and said, "All of the others
will cling to a rope. But you will need to hold on to your daddy. Sit behind
me. Put your arms around me and hold me tightly while I hold the rope."
That we did. We crossed those steep, rough rapids—hanging on for dear
life—and all of us made it safely.1
The Lesson
Brothers and sisters, I nearly lost my life learning a lesson that I now give
to you. As we go through life, even through very rough waters, a father's instinctive
impulse to cling tightly to his wife or to his children may not be the best
way to accomplish his objective. Instead, if he will lovingly cling to the Savior
and the iron rod of the gospel, his family will want to cling to him and to
the Savior.
This lesson is surely not limited to fathers. Regardless of gender, marital
status, or age, individuals can choose to link themselves directly to the Savior,
hold fast to the rod of His truth, and lead by the light of that truth. By so
doing, they become examples of righteousness to whom others will want to cling.
The Commandment
With the Lord, families are essential. He created the earth that we could gain
physical bodies and form families.2
He established His Church to exalt families. He provides temples so that families
can be together forever.3
Of course, He expects fathers to preside over, provide for, and protect their
families.4 But the Master has
asked for much more. Etched in sacred scripture is a commandment to "set
in order thy house."5 Once we as
parents understand the importance and meaning of that commandment, we need to
learn how to do it.
How to Set Your House in Order
To set our house in an order pleasing to the Lord, we need to do it His way.
We are to employ His attributes of "righteousness, godliness, faith, love,
patience, [and] meekness."6
Each father should remember that "no power or influence can or ought to
be maintained by virtue of the priesthood, only by persuasion, by long-suffering,
by gentleness and meekness, and by love unfeigned."7
Parents are to be living examples of "kindness, and pure knowledge, which . . . greatly
enlarge the soul."8 Each
mother and father should lay aside selfish interests and avoid any thought of
hypocrisy, physical force, or evil speaking.9
Parents soon learn that each child has an inborn yearning to be free. Each individual
wants to make his or her own way. No one wants to be restrained, even by a well-intentioned
parent. But all of us can cling to the Lord.
Ages ago, Job taught that concept. He said, "My righteousness I hold fast,
and will not let it go."10
Nephi also taught, "Whoso would hearken unto the word of God, and . . . hold
fast unto it, . . . would never perish."11
These tenets are timeless as the gospel and endless as eternity. Ponder these
additional scriptural admonitions:
From the Old Testament Proverbs we read, "Take fast hold of instruction;
let her not go: keep her; for she is thy life."12
From the New Testament: "Brethren, stand fast, and hold the traditions
which ye have been taught."13
From the Book of Mormon we learn about multitudes who were "continually
holding fast to the rod of iron,"14
likening it to "the word of God."15
Anchored in truth, that iron rod is immovable and immutable.
Other Divine Mandates
Not only are parents to cling to the word of the Lord, but they have a divine
mandate to teach it to their children. Scriptural direction is very clear: "Inasmuch
as parents have children in Zion . . . that teach them not
to understand the doctrine of repentance, faith in Christ the Son of the living
God, and of baptism and the gift of the Holy Ghost by the laying on of the hands,
when eight years old, the sin be upon the heads of the parents."16
That commandment places responsibility and accountability for the teaching
of children squarely upon the shoulders of the parents. The proclamation to
the world regarding the family warns that individuals "who fail to fulfill
family responsibilities will one day stand accountable before God."17
Today I solemnly reaffirm that reality.
In discharging these duties, we need both the Church and the family. They work
hand in hand to strengthen each other. The Church exists to exalt the family.
And the family is the fundamental unit of the Church.
These interrelationships are evident as we study the early history of the Church.
In 1833 the Lord rebuked young leaders of His Church because of parental shortcomings.
The Lord said:
"I have commanded you to bring up your children in light and truth.
"But verily I say unto you, . . .
"You have not taught your children light and truth, according to the commandments.
. . .
"And now a commandment I give unto you . . . you shall
set in order your own house, for there are many things that are not right in
your house. . . . First set in order thy house."18
This revelation represents one of the many powerful validations of the integrity
of the Prophet Joseph Smith. He did not delete from scripture words of stinging
rebuke, even though some were directed to himself.19
In our day, the First Presidency has again stressed parental priority. From
their recent letter to the Saints, I quote: "We call upon parents to devote
their best efforts to the teaching and rearing of their children in gospel principles
which will keep them close to the Church. The home is the basis of a righteous
life, and no other instrumentality can take its place or fulfill its essential
functions in carrying forward this God-given responsibility."20
What Should Parents Teach?
With this sacred charge in mind, let us consider what we should teach. Scriptures
direct parents to teach faith in Jesus Christ, repentance, baptism, and the
gift of the Holy Ghost.21
Parents are to teach the plan of salvation22
and the importance of living in complete accord with the commandments of God.23
Otherwise, their children will surely suffer in ignorance of God's redeeming
and liberating law.24 Parents
should also teach by example how to consecrate their lives—using their
time, talents, tithing, and substance25
to establish the Church and kingdom of God upon the earth.26
Living in that manner will literally bless their posterity. A scripture states,
"Thy duty is unto the church forever, and this because of thy family."27
Opposition to the Family
Parents and children should realize that strong opposition will always come
against the work and will of the Lord.28
Because the work (and glory) of God is to bring to pass our immortality and
eternal life as a family,29 it logically
follows that the work of the adversary will strike directly at the heart of
the home—the family. Relentlessly Lucifer attacks the sanctity of life
and the joy of parenthood.
Because the evil one is ever at work, our vigilance cannot be relaxed—not
even for a moment. A small and seemingly innocent invitation can turn into a
tall temptation which can lead to tragic transgression. Night and day, at home
or away, we must shun sin and "hold fast that which is good."30
The seditious evils of pornography, abortion, and addiction to harmful substances
serve as termites to erode the undergirding strength of a happy home and a faithful
family. We cannot yield to any iniquity without putting our families at risk.
Satan wants us to be miserable just as he is.31
He would animate our carnal appetites, entice us to live in spiritual darkness
and doubt the reality of life after death. The Apostle Paul observed, "If
in this life only we have hope in Christ, we are of all men most miserable."32
Perpetuation of Family Blessings
An understanding of God's great plan of happiness, however, fortifies our faith
in the future. His plan provides answers to ageless questions: Are all our sympathies
and love for each other only temporary—to be lost in death? No! Can family
life endure beyond this period of mortal probation? Yes! God has revealed the
eternal nature of celestial marriage and the family as the source of our greatest
joy.
Brethren and sisters, material possessions and honors of the world do not endure.
But your union as wife, husband, and family can. The only duration of family
life that satisfies the loftiest longings of the human soul is forever. No sacrifice
is too great to have the blessings of an eternal marriage. To qualify, one needs
only to deny oneself of ungodliness and honor the ordinances of the temple.
By making and keeping sacred temple covenants, we evidence our love for God,
for our companion, and our real regard for our posterity—even those yet
unborn. Our family is the focus of our greatest work and joy in this life; so
will it be throughout all eternity, when we can "inherit thrones, kingdoms,
principalities, . . . powers, dominions, . . . exaltation
and glory."33
These priceless blessings can be ours if we set our houses in order now and
faithfully cling to the gospel. God lives. Jesus is the Christ. This is His
Church. President Gordon B. Hinckley is His prophet. I so testify in the name
of Jesus Christ, amen.
NOTES
1. See Russell M. Nelson and Rebecca M. Taylor, "Friend
to Friend," Friend, Mar. 1997, 6–7.
2. See D&C
2:1–3.
3. See D&C
138:47–48.
4. See 1
Tim. 5:8.
5. D&C
93:44; see also 2
Kgs. 20:1; Isa.
38:1.
6. 1
Tim. 6:11.
7. D&C
121:41.
8. D&C
121:42.
9. See 1
Pet. 2:1.
10. Job
27:6.
11. 1
Ne. 15:24.
12. Prov.
4:13.
13. 2
Thes. 2:15. Other related scriptures include "Hold fast the . . . sound
words, which thou hast heard of me, in faith and love which is in Christ Jesus"
(2 Tim.
1:13), and "Let us hold fast the profession of our faith without wavering"
(Heb.
10:23).
14. 1
Ne. 8:30.
15. 1
Ne. 11:25.
16. D&C
68:25; emphasis added.
17. "The
Family: A Proclamation to the World," Ensign, Nov. 1995, 102.
18. D&C
93:40–44.
19. See D&C
93:47.
20. In that letter dated 11 February 1999, signed by Presidents
Gordon B. Hinckley, Thomas S. Monson, and James E. Faust, they also described
what parents might do: "We counsel parents and children to give highest
priority to family prayer, family home evening, gospel study and instruction,
and wholesome family activities. However worthy and appropriate other demands
or activities may be, they must not be permitted to displace the divinely appointed
duties that only parents and families can adequately perform" (in "Policies,
Announcements, and Appointments," Ensign, June 1999, 80).
21. See Moro.
8:10; D&C
19:31; 68:25–34;
138:33;
A of F
1:4.
22. See Moses
6:58–62.
23. See Lev.
10:11; Deut.
6:7; Mosiah
4:14.
24. See 2
Ne. 2:26; Mosiah
1:3; 5:8;
D&C 98:8.
25. See Mosiah
4:21–26; 18:27;
Alma 1:27.
26. See JST, Matt. 6:38.
27. D&C
23:3.
28. See Moro.
7:12–19.
29. See Moses
1:39.
30. 1
Thes. 5:21.
31. See 2
Ne. 2:17–18, 27.
32. 1
Cor. 15:19.
33. D&C
132:19.
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